well Jesus Christ served up some loaves and fishes
he turned water into wine and it was delicious
he wore a lampshade on his head like a thorny crown
yeah, Jesus Christ, he liked to party down
he used to play hackysack and skinny dip in the creek
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well Jesus had a chalice called the Holy Graille
he used wafers and wine for his cakes and ale
he had a dozen brothers help to spread his lovin'
Jesus makes thirteen, hmmm... sounds like a coven
he had magickal powers and a certain mystique
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well Jesus went to the temple, they wuz stonin' some chick
he said "if you never sinned, you can toss the first brick"
well a rock come a'flyin', knocked him flat on his ass
Jesus say "Mama, you're a barrel of laughs!"
she nailed him again when he turned the other cheek
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well Mary Magdalene was a prostitute
she say "I'll rub your feet if you take off your boots"
Jesus said "Mary, do you think we're compatable?"
Magdalena say "Jesus, you're a party animal!"
he started speaking in tongues and she dug his technique
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well Pontious Pilate was a Roman pig
Jesus gave him the message, but he just couldn't dig
Jesus said "peace and love and blessed be!"
Pilate said "nail that hippie's ass to a tree!"
Jesus said "I guess this just ain't my week!"
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well they buried Jesus in a big old cave
they used a gigantic boulder to seal up his grave
Jesus woke up, he rolled away the stone
all his friends come a'callin', Jesus wasn't at home
the found him behind the rock, taking a leak
he was a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak

well Jesus may be a god, but he isn't unique
cause he's a bearded robe and sandal wearing long haired Pagan freak


copyright 2003 Wiccabilly Circus