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Question of the Week: 113

Pagan Problem Children: What Can We Do About Them?

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 Author:    Posted: Nov. 17, 2002   This Page Viewed: 16,712,518  

Vox Q Stats

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Reponses: 108

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Question of the Week: 33 - 3/19/2001

What Is The Appropriate Response to Bigotry and Religious Hatred?

What do you do when someone attacks you for simply being a Pagan? Would this color your perception of all practitioners of that religion? Or would you see it as the act of an individual who may or may not reflect the views of the entire religion? Many Pagans are Wiccans. Does that mean that Wiccans must 'forgive and forget' in order to abide by the Rede? Must we embrace in the name of 'interfaith relations' those who follow a religion that directly or actively campaigns against Pagans? Should we all just 'go along to get along'? When it is appropriate to say "Enough!" and when should we just let it go? What about those anti-Pagan religious sites? What do YOU do when someone hates you just because you are Pagan?

 Reponses:   There are 108 responses posted to this question. Reverse Sort 

I Have Written My Story Many Times For Witchvox, And Everytime I... Mar 19th. at 1:36:02 pm EST

Mary Alderman (Wixom, Michigan US) Age: 36 - Email

I have written my story many times for witchvox, and everytime I find the opportunity I will continue in hopes that things can be changed. My daughter and I had to deal with persecution for 3 years in Chandler, Arizona. She had students beat her up on a daily basis, in the lunchroom kids threw food and bottles at her, and she even had teachers attempt to rip her pentacle from her throat. I made complaints about police officers, who were to teach the "dare" program, regailing christian stories in proof that as a female she was a natural sinner. I had preachers drag my daughter out of the lunchroom with other students to "pray over her" because she was "going to hell". It finally came down to 3 death threats left in her locker and on her school desk, that I finally pulled her out of that school and moved to another state. The school of course, told me that I didn't have good enough reason to pull her from school since those threats are rarely carried out. I had to remind them of Columbine and a variety of other schools. I read a letter sent from a Snert (Snot Nosed Egotistical Religious Twit) in response of Tempest, complaining how Christian hyms should be banned. I say why not. They are offensive to some, and I notice that everytime there is a school shooting that officials have no problem banning the music that the shooter had listened to recent to the incident. I find it appalling that they can't seem to put the blame where it belongs, on the person who committed the act. My daughter listened to Lincoln Park as well, and she does relate with the lyrics. Being pushed to the edge because of the religious hate and intolerance in this country. Though our move has ended the worst of her being abused, she still comes across many bigots and christian rightous twits who will push thier uneducated ideals down her throat. My family is Astaru, so we have a different rede than the Wiccans my daughter defends. We are walking Karma. Yes we fight back daily, and will continue until this ignorance can be stopped. We let it go for years until my daughter almost lost her life. It can not be let go of any longer. To let it go is too high of a cost. Our children's lives.

I Have Two Approaches When Someone Attacks Me Just For Being Pagan... Mar 19th. at 12:53:01 pm EST

Gryphontamer (Corona, California US) Age: 29 - Email

I have two approaches when someone attacks me just for being Pagan. It depends on whether the person seems like they'd be willing to listen or not (and I always try that approach first, assuming that they'd be willing to listen and learn). I managed to get through to a fundamentalist friend of mine by explaining the concept of "many paths, one destination." And I always try to educate, first.

But if someone gets rabid about me being Pagan and refuses to be educated about paganism, I have no qualms about using humor to blow them off. I will explain about Paganism to anyone who's willing to listen. If they're not, then I'll just toss their sanctimonious nonsense back in their face. For example, to the cry of "I'll pray that you find Jesus!" I'll come back with "Why, is he lost?" or "And I'll pray you find the Goddess." I have no qualms about that.

I'm willing to forgive if the person's willing to learn. If they're not willing to open a closed mind, I have no use for them and it doesn't even become a question of forgiveness. Why should I need to forgive someone who doesn't want my forgiveness and wouldn't accept it if I offered it? Better to just let them go on with their life, without me in it.

There's a difference between ignorance and willful ignorance. The people who tend to get in my face about my paganism are usually willfully ignorant, and there's nothing I can do for them.

I admit it took me a while to differentiate between Christians and rabid fundamentalists. But now when I run into a person who attacks me for my faith, I find it almost pitiful, or laughable, that they've chosen to close their minds in this fashion.

As far as the anti-pagan sites? They have a right to their opinions -- misguided though they be -- and any reasonably intelligent person will probably see right through their arguments. I doubt they'll go away, but we don't need to give them any publicity, either. They live off of hate. The less response they get, the faster they'll dwindle and disappear.

The more accepting we can be of other faiths, the worse the unaccepting members of those faiths will look. So yes, I think it's important that we participate in interfaith and just let the rabid antipagan nonsense bounce off. It usually makes the rabid antipagans look much worse than they think it does.

Don't Engage People Who Attack Your Religion In A Fight. If They... Mar 19th. at 12:26:32 pm EST

Blu Coyote (St Paul, Minnesota US) Age: 22 - Email

Don't engage people who attack your religion in a fight. If they seem genuinely interested in learning about your faith, explain as honestly as you can, but people who attack you should either be ignored or answered briefly with something like, "I'm sorry you feel that way. Hopefully someday you'll realize that we all follow the same Divine Power; we just call it by different names & practice in different ways." Unless they're harassing you at bus stops and grocery-store check-out lines, in which case pretend they're not there. No one wins these arguments. I used to get into fights about gay rights, prayer in schools, abortion; you name it, I probably fought about it. My father is Jewish, & my Christian fundamentalist class-mates claimed that not only was he going to hell, but my mother & I (devout Christians at the time) would join him because converting him wasn't our lives' work. I got TIRED of fighting, because no one ever changed anyone's mind. But educate anyone who really wants to know about Paganism; when I told my dear Catholic friend I was becoming a Pagan, she admitted she had a hard time taking me seriously because of the fairy tales she read as a kid. I take every opportunity I get to explain what I believe & practice, & I see her skepticism (which could've soured into hate if left unchecked) expand into understanding. If we stop hate before it starts, we benefit not only ourselves but the generations to follow.

The ENOUGH line gets crossed where there is a large-scale attack against you or your community. Hit back--with a POSITIVE message. If they call you Satan-worshipping child sacrificers, don't say, "We want our cross-burning, hate-mongering opponents to know that we are about harmony & love." Acknowledge the concerns, & explain your side. Talk about your Paganism honestly; show the love & respect you have for Nature & all people. Don't feed hatred by stooping to their level. The dumbest thing I ever did was help my friends write an angry email to Fred Phelps with graphic descriptions of gay & lesbian sex. I'm sure it's on his web page as "further proof of the depravity of homosexuals." Be proatcive, not reactive. But do defend yourself. There IS a limit to free speech. As my government teacher said, "Your right to swing your fist ends where my face starts."

I Think Walking The Walk Is Key To Combatting The Efforts Of... Mar 19th. at 12:09:46 pm EST

Greg (Mesa, Arizona US) Age: 24 - Email

I think walking the walk is key to combatting the efforts of the militantly ignorant. Walking the path of love, light, compassion, self-exploration, and joy radiates into the world around us. People will react positively for this, and then when they find out you're some brand of Pagan, their heads will spin. They don't know what to do with someone who is a good person and not a Christian. I tend not to engage in debate or confrontation with people who are totally closed off, because I don't need that energy in my life. Words are powerful tools especially when they are supported by action.

Blessings to all!

I Run A Couple Pagan Websites, And I've Gotten Some Pretty Nasty... Mar 19th. at 11:57:02 am EST

Rev Lisa G Whittaker (Madras, Oregon US) Age: 37 - Email

I run a couple Pagan websites, and I've gotten some pretty nasty emails about them. I've had people literally wish me dead. I've gotten emails from people saying they "hope God gets his revenge" on me for having these just goes on and on.

If they leave a return email address, I generally respond to them. I don't flame them or get nasty back. I generally give a short synopsis of Pagan beliefs and compare them to the beliefs and practices of the person who has just slammed me. Rarely have a had a response, which I find interesting. Perhaps they are turned off because I don't respond with the same kind of hate and intolerance they have shown me. Who knows.

I'm clergy, so I deal with intolerance and misinformation about the Pagan path all the time. I've just learned not to let it get under my skin. Also, my particular path, Goddess Moon Circles, as a wonderful support system in our other clergymembers.

If anyone needs someone to talk to because of religious intolerance, please feel free to contact any Goddess Moon Circles clergy. You can find our clergy listings at

Amidst All The Hate, Heated Rhetoric And Emotion That Surrounds This Issue... Mar 19th. at 11:46:26 am EST

Caireen Caerdhu (Kalamazoo, Michigan US) Age: 28 - Email

Amidst all the hate, heated rhetoric and emotion that surrounds this issue we must strive to remember we reap what we sow. If we react to those who hate us with hate, we will receive only hate. Speak out against ideas, not people or groups of people. Not all Christians hate pagans. Several people who know me as a pagan have come to truly understand what that means, not just by what I say, but by how I choose to live and how I choose to be. These lessons are stronger, by far.

I am not included my mundane name as I am a closeted pagan because I teach in a highly conservative Christian community where everyday I strive to teach tolerance for all the earth's creations, not just pagans and not just humans.

Dear Witchvox, Well To Tell You The Truth I Either Ignore Them... Mar 19th. at 11:43:35 am EST

Goldragon (Hazleton, Pennsylvania US) Age: 20 - Email

Dear Witchvox,
Well to tell you the truth I either ignore them or try to educate them. I've found that most criticism is based on ignorance I've always found that once you educate them they usualy leave you alown..I've even found some that wanted to practace paganism after hearing about it. The biggest thing to keep in mind is NOT TO LET IT GET TO YOU. Letting it get to you only fules the fire so to speak. As I've said to many people in the past..don't hate anyone for their faith...all faiths take you to the God and Goddess in the end:)(:


In My Eight Years On My Path, I Have Experienced Everything From... Mar 19th. at 10:37:34 am EST

SilverCat (Boston, Massachusetts US) Age: 26 - Email

In my eight years on my Path, I have experienced everything from complete joy to complete hatred about my beliefs. The joy in its purest form comes from the family member or friend who comments "It's just so clear how much your faith has helped you grow into the beautiful person you are." The hate in its purest form comes in actions that suggest that I should feel like I am not worthy of being part of the human race.

I have been spit upon, screamed at, and received threats of "burning me at the stake" (how original *snort*) for my beliefs. And what do I do in return? For the harassers that are face to face with me, I look in the eye and tell them I'm sorry they feel so much hatred, and hope that someday they will find the connection to the Divine that their soul seems to be desperately crying out for. This usually sends them running, because it clearly is NOT the reaction they're trying to get. If it's in email, I either delete it, or send it to the ISP.

Although it's the hardest thing in the world to do, show that you are above the garbage being directed to you. Vent to the people you know you can release the pain in front of, but do not break down to the abusers, because it's exactly what they want.


Each Situation Has To Be Handled On It's Own Merits. We Cannot... Mar 19th. at 7:18:48 am EST

Trish Telesco (Western, New York US) Age: 40 - Email

Each situation has to be handled on it's own merits. We cannot allow faith to become a side show... we cannot give in to temper tantrums. There are some people's whose minds will not be changed no matter what we say or do, others whose minds will change with time and tenacity, and some who are willing to listen. Our wisdom comes in educating the latter two and not wasting energy on the first.

I fully believe if you are being persecuted for your faith you have the right, and perhaps the responsibility, to fight. If this country is going to have religious freedom, at some point we may be called upon to stand up and be counted. This process can be scarry and difficult, but thanks to organizations like the ACLU, AREN, and Americans for separation of Church and State - we do have a "voice" with which to speak in unity.

In educating people we need to avoid certain traps. Use jargon that person will understand ... be real, be honest, be direct, and be professional (Wren's works here are an excellent example). Don't speak of those things of which you're uncertain (either say you'll get back to them or direct that person to someone else you know has the correct information). If you follow that basic guideline you'll rarely go wrong. The problem becomes that all too often those who should not speak - do and paint incorrect or immature portraits of the whole.

We may not change the world overnight - but improvements are happening. Even five years ago magick wasn't in the public eye like it is now (mind you that means more scrutiny too). We just can't get complacent and stop because change is happening. Keep walking the walk; live your life in a unique spiritual way; be the magick. One moment and one person at a time - we can make a difference.

From My Experience, I Believe That There Are Several Reponses To Bigotry... Mar 19th. at 6:34:24 am EST

Naomi Claydon (Derby, England UK) Age: 22 - Email

From my experience, I believe that there are several reponses to bigotry. There are the mildest cases, where a bigot (I will not use the term Christian to describe these people, because the Christians I know in no way deserve to be tarred with the same brush as these people) spots your pentacle, homes in you, and asks if you know that 'Jesus loves you'. Disconcerting though this is, it's worth bearing in mind that these people, however much your beliefs diverge, are generally motivated by a genuine concern for the state of your soul. The least they deserve is courtesy for this, so the best thing to do here is simply thank you and walk away. Feel free to walk quickly, though.

For more severe cases, for example, such as the endangerment of your family, friends, employment, and so forth, there is generally a recourse to law. Those of us in the UK, and our American friends, are blessed in that we live in countries where are religious freedoms are protected by law. I know sometimes bigots give us good cause to doubt that, but believe me there are countries all over the world where the inmhabitants could, and have, killed for the freedoms we enjoy. So why not employ this legal freedom if you're being threatened?

Coupled with these short-term solutions, the longer term benefits are probably best felt by interfaith communication. This doesn't mean you must actively embrace the die-hard bigots (except when they're one of your own parents, as in my case) but the greater majority of people- and most Christians are lovely, intelligent people practising the very virtues the Bible teaches, it's just that the bigots shout louder- are people who simply aren't sure what paganism involves, and interfaith dialogues help replace half- believed fears with the truth about pagans and what we do. Ignorance is bliss, but knowledge is tolerance.

Perhaps this is the best thing we can do for paganism: Instead of getting into a slagging match with the bigots, let's lead by an example of tolerance and openess. Again in my experience, nothing form a person's idea of paganism like knowing a pagan, and the behaviour of that pagan will fix that person'a idea of the whole religion for ever. What message would you like to give?

What Is The Proper Response To Bigotry And The Religious Hatred? I... Mar 19th. at 5:22:12 am EST

John T Morgan (U.S. Army) Age: 23 - Email

What is the proper response to bigotry and the religious hatred?

I have been a pagan as long as I was able to walk my mother and her mother walked the pagan path; while my fathers side of the family is devout babtists this posed some interresting discussions while i was growing up from one side of the family i was taught that do as thou will but harm ye none. but the other side of the family was if you even think of doing anything that we don't say is right you have sinned and out came grams bible for her interpretation of the word.

This taught me that it is always a good idea to look at everything with an open mind because there re vthose who don't look at things with an open mind and these are the people you have the most opposition from.

when i was in high school I was teased andtaunted because of my size; I am a man of small stature but I got the worse taunting because of being pagan I had sinner written on my locker I was active on the sports teams which they didn't care much about that.

One thing that living as a pagan has taught me is that there is a whole world of people that will find something to hate you for because they are clo0se minded and ignorant "There really must be bliss in ignorance because alot of people not just christians are enjoying it".

As for interfaith relationships my father was babtist he and mymother were married for 12 years before they devorced becuase of his drinking.I have had interfaith relationships it is a fear that when they find out my religious preference that they will run.. ohh well I guess that it was not meant to be so off to the market I go..

when you feelthat you have been truely threatened that is pretty much enough and time to defend yourself physically and spiritually. but don't jump to conclusions that will bite you back in the long run.

Why complain about what someone has on their site it its not like they made you go to that sites pay it no my and keep traveling your path

this is the wisdom of a Man a Pagan and a Soldier in the U.S. Army and Yes I Stand up and Fight for Your Right to Agree and Disagree...

The Appropriate Response Depends On The Action Of The People Involved. If... Mar 19th. at 1:21:48 am EST

Perrin (Denver, Colorado US) Age: 24

The Appropriate Response depends on the action of the people involved. If it just words, then great, verbal sparring is always goof for a democracy. If it becomes physical, make certain you have the bigger guns, it was not that long ago in our history that Witches were burned at the stake. Personally I would rather not be on the barbique. As to inerfaith marriages, they can work if both parties involved are truly in love, but if it is a forced marriage, IE someone caught doing some thing they should have waited for, then it won't last for more than 6 months at best.

Personally ENOUGH is when there are 300 of them & 1 of you, which is why I started looking into witchcraft.

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