Modern Day Mayhem: Time, Release, and Learning to Fly
Article ID: 10977
Age Group: Adult
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Author: Raveneve Night
Posted: September 17th. 2006
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Modern-Day Mayhem: Time, Release, and Learning to Fly
“How do we know who we are, if we don’t know who we are?”
It is easy to hide the Self in the mayhem we consider the modern-day world. We are encouraged to fill every space, all time and beyond, with the material world. We are being consumed by it. Be you male or female, you feel the pull of the job, home, and family—or sometimes, let’s face it, all three. Finding time to think and be is probably the most difficult achievement in today’s society.
We tend to think that this is a modern problem. Virginia Woolf wrote that the reason that women (unlike their male counterparts) do not write is that they do not have a ‘Room of their Own’. This problem of a time to think was recognised then and is still very much a problem today.
It is absolutely essential, however, that you find time to be you, to think your thoughts, feel, and react. How? Well, the solution is being selfish enough to give yourself an allotment of time a day. Start small: 5 minutes where it is absolutely forbidden for anyone to bother you. Mothers with small children can hide in the toilet, if need be. All toilets should be able to be locked by an adult. It is interesting to note that people often use the toilet as a hideaway (or to get out of the washing up); this is the reason there are so many interesting pieces of literature kept there. Be strong. No phone calls, especially mobiles; no fights. Make yourself a time in which, unless there is an accident or death, it is yours.
You think it is impossible. I tell you it is not. It may take a while for friends or family to grasp the idea that you need privacy, but you do need this. How can you listen to the rhythm of Nature, spiritual guidance, or what your body is telling you, if you do not have time to think?
The idea of having time to think is to help you and your body sort out what you feel about what is happening around and to you. It is the plague of the era that we must appear to be strong no matter what. Therefore, feelings are shoved down, and you keep on soldiering. It has even become a fixture in the English language, to ‘soldier on’. This is fine in emergencies or times of great stress, but to live with this as a day-by-day attitude results in the making of masks to cover our emotions so that we don’t have to feel. The body becomes sick because there is never any release, and we continually have an increase in disease until we are forced to stop or slow down.
The modern-day syndrome of overwork combined with no release of emotions is a killer. All you have to do is look at the rate of heart-attack deaths (the heart chakra is where the feeling/emotion energy is located) to realise the truth of this lifestyle.
I give you permission to take time to think, feel, and be.
There; that wasn’t so hard. If anyone argues, tell them I said so!
If Witchcraft were to have a motto, it would be, being in tune with the Goddess and the Horned God, nature, the world around us, and ourselves. It would be almost impossible to reach this state without dealing with the Self/Ego, and to do this you must have time to reflect, get rid of the problems weighing you down, and file all old news.
Most religions in the world include time, time for prayer, meditation, and reflection. Equal to this concept is the creative ways in which we tell ourselves that we do not have time. There will always be some excuse. Some of these will be legitimate, but as when we have to do homework for school, something else will grab our attention, (usually small, sticky, and wanting to go to the toilet), and we will be consumed. Part of the growth of spirituality is the ability to have time to grapple with our problems, (yes, I am nagging, but this is a very important point) and the expansion of the mind through study and reflection. No time, no reflection, and little growth. If you are a vampire not having a reflection is a great thing, but for the rest of us poor mortals, it sucks (pun intended).
Part of the solution is to have like-minded friends who are happy to chat, think, and reflect on the hairy problems of philosophy, faith, spirituality, and the magic of being a Witch, Druid, Fairy Priestess, etc. This need for like-minded companionship is evidenced in Christianity by church services, bible studies, and faith camps. (It has worked for them and us for centuries; therefore, it must answer a human need). In the same way that Christians are bolstered through friendship and counsel, so Pagans and their spirituality and magic are expanded by covens, meetings, workshops, coffee-shop discussions, and like-minded friends.
This can be a problem when your partner or closest friend is not drawn to and does not have cravings for knowledge in the area in which you are starting to travel. Now, sometimes this difference is not an issue. There are trusting couples (I have one of them) who will let each other explore the endless boundaries of their mutual paths and still worship each in love and light (or the left-hand path if that is where your journey takes you). But for others this change of path or spiritual purpose can make them feel unsure, dishonest, and hesitant because their partner, parent, or friend does not approve of the direction they are traveling.
The best description of this change of spirit is vibrations at which we resonate. The exploration and expansion of the mind shows that you are moving to a different vibration spiritually. (Please note that here I am saying different, not good or bad. There are many paths to the Goddess/God, and all of them are equal. Paganism is the many to make up the One).
When you start to move to a different vibration, you often start to question and look for something other than the acknowledged religions. This can happen to the Pagan teenager in the Christian household or to the Christian teenager in the Pagan household. Both of these situations are as equally fraught with tension and anger. The exploration and expansion of the mind moves you to a different path and vibration. You no longer fit your family or environment. You start to question and go searching for the path that suits you. Today it is easier than ever before to explore other cultures and belief systems. What you choose to believe will often be an amalgamation of many ideas blended into a unique whole. This phenomenon has given the rise to the Neo-Pagan, someone who takes an aspect of many and tailors the belief system to themselves.
This movement of personal vibration causes us to be drawn to people of similar vibrations. Like attracts like. But the changing of the vibration can cause many problems, probably the biggest being that we no longer are attracted as strongly to people of different vibrations.
If you are in a long-standing marriage, you have several options. One is to hide your beliefs from your partner and ignore any messages or ideas that you have been sent. Two, break off your relationship and look for a partner who is attracted to your ideas, or three, be honest with your partner and tell the truth. Either your partner will accept your exploration of spirituality and support you or deny it. Hopefully, if your partner denies it, they will still allow you the freedom to choose your beliefs.
At this point I cannot advise you on the path you need to take. It is your path, but I feel that honesty tends to be the simplest of all solutions. Whatever you decide to do, you must try to be empathetic and sympathetic to your partner. If this means that you do decide to break up, be gentle; after all, you must try to do no harm. It is not their fault that they are not traveling the same path as you. Their path may be totally different, and they may need different lessons. Kindness counts.
To the teenager locked into their family, this is a very different situation. At this time the search of identity can be very emotional and hurtful. You no longer fit the skin you have had all your life, but there is no guidebook that tells you what you need to become. So like a butterfly, you change, change, and change again, looking for the right set of wings to fly.This can be just as heartbreaking for your family as it is for you as they discover that their little princess or prince has become a creature of black with spiky hair and talks in an unknown language.
First thing for you to understand is that as a Wiccan it is our creed to harm none, and this prohibition includes yourself. Your emotions rage; you think nobody loves you or understand who you are. Your room is black; your music is loud; and you write poetry of death. Guess what? You are normal. You are sane and you are not alone. Look at http://waningmoon.com/sitemap.html, which is a Web site developed by John Coughlin for all those who are attracted to the Gothic or the path of the Crone (Left-hand path of Paganism).
Suicide is a harm to yourself, so if you are trying to commit suicide, you are harming. The Goddess/Horned God needs you, every one of you. You are loved and belong in Their light. It doesn’t matter if you are gay, heterosexual, fat or thin, rich or poor, black, green, purple or blue. You are loved.
Living in a family who hates what you become is very hard emotionally, physically, and mentally. Being a Witch, Druid or Pagan in a white, Christian-dominated society is at times like a torture that just goes on. But you know, we become strong, sure, and very competent. We fight the good fight and walk away from the ones that do not matter.
As a teen, you are the only who has the right to decide who you want to be. This is your choice, and no one can take it away from you. But like anyone, you have to know when to fight the fight and when to walk away. Trying to discuss Wiccan ideology with your school principal when you are in trouble probably is like pushing snow up a mountain: it just gets thicker and heavier and will never change its opinion that it is snow.
The fights to fight are if your parents decide you are going to follow their religion no matter what, if your friends keep trying to ‘save’ you from yourself, or if your teacher is bullying you. Be true to your beliefs, not theirs. If these efforts continue, then it is bullying. If you fear for yourself, it is harassment and illegal. You have the right to feel safe. Keep a record of harassment, a journal. Make sure that when you write it you don’t swear or threaten to kill anyone; you want this to be a legal document and show that you are adult enough to know your own mind.
If this situation continues, talk to a person in authority who is neutral—the police, a counselor or school administration (providing that they are not part of the problem)—and let them know what is happening. If you live with it, it will never stop. If your school will not deal with the bullying and harassment, go to the police. It is their duty to follow through, and your complaints are then recorded. School administration is terrified of looking like they cannot deal with your problems. I know this because I am a Wiccan school teacher working in a public school. Believe me, they are scared of police, newspapers, and cranky parents, so you must use the weapons you have to keep yourself safe.
Whatever you decide to do, know that you are loved and wanted. You have the right to believe what you will, and if what you believe harms none, then go for it.
In the perfect world, we all have time to be who we are. Reflection and spiritual freedom go hand-in-hand with love, honesty, and trust. Parents respect their children’s choices, and spouses allow partners to be who they are. In the perfect world.
In the real world we have choices and learn to live by them. Toddlers always know the most inconvenient or embarrassing time to walk in on their parents. Partners sometimes will not understand their wife or husband and will try to control and gain power. Bullies have a closed mind, and if you are not like them then you are the enemy. Teenagers will explore and irritate their parents, and teenagers’ parents will be bewildered by the creatures they have spawned.
The only person who knows if you are going down the right path is you. Keep safe, feel strong, know that you are not alone, possessed, insane, or in danger of losing your soul. You are part of a great and growing family, a family of individuals with as many creeds as the stars. You are needed. God/Goddess/ Greater Ascended Masters/ Angels/ Fairies look after you.
Room of Her Own, Virignia Woolf
Copyright: Permission must be granted for article to be replicated. Raveneve Night@2006
Location: Mirani, Queensland
Bio: I am a Wiccan school teacher will a amazing amount of experience. I have followed my hedgewitch path for 14 years and still feel like a child. So much to learn so little time.
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