Article ID: 13365
Age Group: Adult
Days Up: 1,664
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Posted: January 3rd. 2010
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So where to begin? My own personal story of how I found Wicca is rather long. I can give you the abridged version however. It was something that has been with me for a long time. You often hear people say there were pagan there whole life but never really knew it, well this was the case for me.
I canít say I grew up in a strictly religious home. We rarely went to church; I did however go to church (Baptist) with my friendsí family mostly to keep her company through the long dull hours of endless talking occasionally interrupted by a stray ďamenĒ. Subconsciously I think I wanted to be closer to god I just didnít think about it. I always found church fascinating and a bight frightening.
Fascinating because the people attending just agreed with anything the pastor said. Frightening because it was like sitting in a room of zombies to say the least. There did not appear to be any personal thought or comprehension going on in the slightest everyone agreed regardless of what was said. I also found it upsetting because the pastor would go on about so many unrelated topics.
Surely there were all here to discuss Jesus Christ and God. But not four or five minutes into the sermon and the pastor would start spewing this negativity about everything. Democrats, non Christians or ďnon believersĒ as they were called sometimes... anyone with ideas that clashed their own views of what they thought was rightĒÖ
Now Iíll just stop here and say I know for a fact not all churches are like this but this is my own personal experience. I was shocked I believed Ė correct me if Iím wrong- that Jesus preached love and acceptance not hate and prejudice. I stopped going because I couldnít sit in the room I could feel the negativity actually physically feel it and it made me feel sick and distraught. No wonder so many people are stressed these days if on the one day they get off they put themselves in a place of worship but instead of fortifying their relationship with God they spend hours trashing people and practices.
I was hovering on the edge of agnostic maybe even atheist especially after my Father and grandfather died, loosing all of our money to pay his hospital bills and now being forced to move across the country three thousand miles away to be exact to find a new home all in about 5 months. I thought God had abandoned me. Then I remembered a trip I took to Boston when I was 12 years old.
We went to Salem most specifically the witch museum. I remember the display pressing the little button and hearing a cool female voice expressing the love for nature and peace they possess. I went online that night and typed the words ďWhat is WiccaĒ into the search browser and that was probably the best idea of my life so far. Thousands of pages came up all loaded with information. I got a snack then pulled all small dogs in the vicinity onto my lap and began to read.
With each new page my heart filled with hope again. This religion seemed too perfect like it fit like a glove matched and suited my every thought perfectly. I almost cried it felt like I had come home. I knew this was what I was. I always felt at home in nature especially forests. The sounds the smells made me feel alive and apart of the earth. I found myself sitting by the huge lake in the Adirondacks when my family and I traveled up there, breathing so deeply eyes closed absorbing the energy. I remember my legs and arms feeling tingly as I sat there.
Now years later I recognize that as the goddess. I was home just the thought of Wicca made me feel at peace. School became tolerable the previous rush of noise and confused emotions now was gentle and casual trickle of time passing.
Well here I am today. I wont share my exact practices with you but I will tell you some things. First of all I do not have any ritual tools. I donít really have the money for food, let alone athames, besoms, cauldrons, crystals, etc. Iíve learned that thatís okay. Even my rituals are nothing elaborate because I donít really have the time. I donít know of any other Wiccans in my old home area or my new one but again thatís ok.
My life is defiantly better now. Wicca has given me that warm glowing feeling in my chest that I believe you should get from any religion. Religion had always seemed like a chore to me instead of something that improved my life.
I still have so much to learn and so much to discover but thatís my favorite part. I donít think any one person knows all there is about Wicca there is always something new to learn. There are no specific set of rules for which I am glad because I do disagree with some concepts none of which I will write down because the purpose of my writing is not to start arguments but to inform others of the start to my personal journey.
I will close by saying this. Yes this world is an intimidating and scary place but it does not matter. Tread lightly around people and never go around exclaiming loudly that you are Wiccan because as pathetic as it is not safe. Even though you may feel the love for everyone and everything there are so many people who believe that they are the only people with sense in the world. The fragile bubble of their beliefs is (in their mind) always being poked at and people like us who donít go with the norm and donít follow and do exactly as they do.
Regardless I think you should still give everyone a chance and if they do not agree with what you are saying donít shove your opinions down their throats or bite their heads off. Just walk away. There are too many people in this world to bother yourself with one.
Love, Light and Happiness blessing of water, fire, wind, and earth. May the goddess be smiling down on you always and Blessed be.
- Rampant Celt
Location: Gilbert, Arizona
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