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July 13th. 2016 ...
What Every Pagan Should Know About Curses
Magic With A Flick of my Finger
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An Open Mind and Heart
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Faery Guided Journey
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April 2nd. 2016 ...
An Alternative Conception of Divine Reciprocity
Becoming Wiccan: What I Never Expected
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The Fear of Witchcraft
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Magic in Sentences
March 28th. 2016 ...
Revisiting The Spiral
Lateral Transcendence: Toward Greater Compassion
Spring Has Sprung!
January 22nd. 2016 ...
Coming Out of the Broom Closet
Energy and Karma
Community and Perception
December 20th. 2015 ...
Introduction to Tarot For the Novice
Magia y Wicca
October 24th. 2015 ...
Facing Your Demons: The Shadow Self
The Dream Eater--A Practical Use of Summoning Talismans
Native American Spirituality Myopia
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Feeling the Pulse of Autumn
October 16th. 2015 ...
Sacred Lands, Sacred Hearts
September 30th. 2015 ...
September 16th. 2015 ...
Nature Worship: or Seeing the Trees for the Ents
Vegan or Vegetarian? The Ethical Debate
August 6th. 2015 ...
Lost - A Pagan Parent's Tale
July 9th. 2015 ...
Love Spells: The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly
The Magic of Weather
June 7th. 2015 ...
A Pagan Altar
A Minority of a Minority of a Minority
The Consort: Silent Partner or Hidden in Plain Sight?
Why I Bother With Ritual: Poetry and Eikonic Atheism
May 6th. 2015 ...
Sex, Lies, and Witches: Love in a Time of Wiccans and Atheists
Gods, Myth, and Ritual in Naturalistic Paganism
I Claim Cronehood
13 Keys: The Crown of Kether
March 29th. 2015 ...
A Thread in the Tapestry of Witchcraft
March 28th. 2015 ...
On Wiccan Magick, Theurgy, Thaumaturgy and Setting Expectations
March 1st. 2015 ...
Choosing to Write a Shadow Book
Historiolae: The Spell Within the Story
My Concept Of Grey
February 1st. 2015 ...
Seeker Advice From a Coven Leader
The Three Centers of Paganism
Magick is No Illusion
The Ancient Use of God/Goddess Surnames
The Gods of My Heart
January 1st. 2015 ...
The Six Most Valuable Lessons I've Learned on My Path as a Witch
Manipulation of the Concept of Witchcraft
Publicly Other: Witchcraft in the Suburbs
Pagans All Around Us
Broomstick to the Emerald City
October 20th. 2014 ...
Thoughts on Conjuring Spirits
A Microcosmic View of Ma'at
October 5th. 2014 ...
The History of the Sacred Circle
Abandoning Expectations and Remembering Your Roots
September 28th. 2014 ...
Seeking Pagan Lands for Pagan Burials
Creating a Healing Temple
September 20th. 2014 ...
GOD AND ME (A Pagan's Personal Reply to the New Atheists)
September 7th. 2014 ...
Deer Man- A Confounding Mystery
August 31st. 2014 ...
Coven vs. Solitary
A Strange Waking Dream
August 24th. 2014 ...
Thoughts on Cultural and Spiritual Appropriation
The Pagan Cleric
A Gathering of Sorcerers (A Strange Tale)
NOTE: For a complete list of articles related to this chapter... Visit the Main Index FOR this section.
Dare to Dream!
Article ID: 14276
Age Group: Adult
Days Up: 2,090
Times Read: 2,945
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Author: Kylia Heartsong
Posted: November 7th. 2010
Times Viewed: 2,945
I recently received an email that tugged at my heartstrings.
It came from a young woman who was asking for advice regarding her partner's displeasure with her choice to explore a Wiccan path. After having discussed this with him, she was convinced that should she follow her heart, her partner, who was Christian, would leave her. His reason, she further explained, was that he wanted her to accompany him to Heaven.
As a former Christian, who was married in a very traditional Catholic ceremony, I distinctly recall this issue being covered in the “till DEATH do us part” section of the marriage vows! Just sayin.’
Now, I've seen enough evidence of afterlife phenomenon to feel comfortable in saying that I don't believe our spiritual lives end with death. And at the time of this writing, I’m fairly certain that the age old question, “Where do we go when we die”, has yet to be answered. I also know, with absolutely certainty, that no one that resides on this Earthly plane has a personal guest list that includes the names of those who will be invited to join us beyond the veil!
I think it’s safe to say that many of us began our lives following a system of beliefs bestowed upon us by our parents. At some point however, perhaps due to a crisis of faith or the simple realization that we no longer feel the same sense of spiritual connection that we once had, we become seekers. Obviously, for those people in our lives that are content with their own spirituality and/or who had come to believe that for us the feeling was mutual, this may not go over very well, especially when one chooses to follow a religion that is not exactly part of the mainstream. Given that our human relationships are often at the mercy of the frailties that we, as mere mortals possess, this can be a real deal breaker for some relationships.
I am of the opinion however, that one's spirituality is completely off limits to anyone other than the person who is walking that Path. When that Path happens to be Wicca, where misconception still abounds, the people whom are most concerned about our well-being are naturally going to express their misgivings. And as much as their concern for us is forgivable, if we are of otherwise sound mind, no one, by virtue of their relationship to us, should assume they are entitled to impose their Will upon the journey taken by our souls. In other words, "Who died and made you God?”
That being said, there's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to spend all eternity with the one you love. If, like me, you are a hopeless romantic, then you live for this stuff! However, wanting to share one’s spirituality with their partner and having that partner decide their spirituality for them is an entirely different matter. Even if it happens that we share the same religious beliefs, our relationship with Deity will always be uniquely our own and in itself, sacred.
After living life from the perspective of a kid whose nose was perpetually pressed against the candy store window, I finally began to shed my Christian trappings to pursue a Wiccan path. When it became glaringly obvious that my interest in Wicca/Witchcraft was something more than just a passing fancy soon to be whisked away upon the wind, my husband expressed his concerns about what I might be “getting myself into". As my interest grew, he became increasingly apprehensive, until one fateful day, as I sat reading one of my shiny, new books on Wicca, the fine line between concern and intrusion began to.... blur. Following a heated debate, he subtly suggested that should I continue, I might be putting our marriage in jeopardy.
Oh no, he didn’t!
Firstly, allow me to say that my husband is one of the most open-minded, non-judgmental people I know. So for him to even remotely make such a statement, I knew that this had to be making him more than just a little bit nervous. Despite my best efforts to allay his fears that I may soon be recruited into some crazed Witchcraft cult, he still remained skeptical. He was also worried that, should my Wiccan beliefs become public knowledge, it might adversely impact our family, careers and the well-being of our children.
And I must confess his fears were not unfounded. I’d heard the horror stories of those who had lost their children or jobs as a result of their beliefs. Call it intuition or premonition, but I was absolutely certain that this was not going to be an issue. Unfortunately, intuition alone was not enough to convince him of the same.
As I stood there, gazing ahead at a path that I’d spent the better part of my life searching for, I felt completely and utterly…. torn! Not to mention…livid pissed! Of course my relationship with my husband, our marriage and our children were of utmost importance, but was it fair to allow societal prejudices to decide something as profound as my relationship to the Divine? I felt that I had come too far to allow fear to send me scurrying back to the realm of “normalcy” so that everyone else might sleep a little better at night. That’s what Valium is for!
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
For me, there was no fear or doubt, just an undeniable need to heed the call.
So, what happened on that fateful night? Well, I carefully put down my shiny, new book, looked across the room at my husband, the man I had married so many years before, the father of my children and said, "Ray, trust me on this one, it would not be in your best interest to make me choose". Some might call it madness. I called it…. a leap of faith.
Sixteen years later, we’re still married and I’m still a Witch!
In Darkness, Light!
"The Raven" ~ Edgar Allan Poe
Copyright: This essay is registered and protected under MyFreeCopyright
Location: Ridgewood, New Jersey
Author's Profile: To learn more about Kylia Heartsong - Click HERE
Bio: Kylia Heartsong (Tracy Frasche) is an initiate of British Tradition Gardnerian Wicca. Born on Beltaine, Tracy’s lifelong affinity for the occult arts led her on spiritual journey culminating in the discovery of this beautiful Path we know as Wicca. She has been practicing for approximately 16+ years, give or take a year and a day. In addition to her own Tradition, she is interested in Intuitive Magick, Traditional Rootwork and Shamanic Healing practices.
Her other passions include reading, photography, antiquing, gardening, creative writing, poetry and Zumba (Latin/International Dance fusion) .
In speaking out publicly as a Wiccan/Witch, Tracy hopes to educate the general population about the misconceptions surrounding the Wiccan religion and the practice of Witchcraft.
She is a Jikiden Reiki practitioner certified at both the Shoden and Okuden levels. She is also a certified Reiki Master/Teacher in the Usui System of Natural Healing. She has recently completed course work as an “End of Life” Doula.
Tracy, along with her husband of 24 years, their two children and many, many…many furry babies, reside in Bergen County, New Jersey.
You can read more of Tracy’s musings at:
Other Articles: Kylia Heartsong has posted 4 additional articles- View them?
Other Listings: To view ALL of my listings: Click HERE
Email Kylia Heartsong... (Yes! I have opted to receive invites to Pagan events, groups, and commercial sales)
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