Articles/Essays From Pagans
March 9th. 2014 ...
Healing the Witch Within
Discovering Wicca as a Young Child
March Pisces Energy: Pre-natal Memories and Standing Upright
March 2nd. 2014 ...
Lessons of Ostara: Six Ways to Move Forward
The Wiccan Priest - The Misunderstood Role
Which is Which? Am I a Warlock or a Witch?
The Secret Teaching: Selected Aspects
February 23rd. 2014 ...
Wicca or Traditional Witchcraft: Some Differences
Everything is Not Under Your Control: Making Sense of the Senseless
The Wonders and Gifts of Paganism and Community
What Makes Us What We Are
February 16th. 2014 ...
Death, Grief, and Psychopomp Work in Shamanic Healing
The Stones of Fear: Anxiety Relief
Spiritual Traveler: Form To Essence
Alternative Medicine – What Is It?
February 9th. 2014 ...
Words of Power!
The Allure of Glamour in the Apocolypse
Lunar Insight Planetary Preponderances: Year of the Horse, Imbolc and Mercury Grazings
February 2nd. 2014 ...
The Magick of Jewelry and Metals
Building a Magick Mirror
The Golden Bough: a Study Guide (Part 2)
January 26th. 2014 ...
Love of Self: The Hardest Thing To Do
The Golden Bough as a Seminal Work in the Neo Pagan Movement (Part 1)
13 Keys: The Mercy of Chesed
Lightworking In The Screen Age: Staying Connected
January 19th. 2014 ...
Open Letter to the Goddess
A Southern Girl's Guide to Hospitality
Social Conventions and the Pagan World
January 12th. 2014 ...
Never Once Was There a An Athame Near My Chalice: My Very Sheltered Occultist Upbringing
One Wiccan's Journey Through Depression
January 5th. 2014 ...
Religion vs Practice: Defining Witchcraft in a Modern Age
Traditional Apprenticeships: Training in the Modern Pagan Abbey
2014's Magickal Magnificent Manifestations!
Lunar Insight Moon Musings, Planetary Preponderances: Wise and Wild
December 29th. 2013 ...
My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons (Part 3)
13 Keys: The Might of Geburah
Beyond The Season of Greed
December 22nd. 2013 ...
My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons (Part 2)
December 15th. 2013 ...
The Hex Murder of 1928
My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons (Part 1)
Lady of the Forest Mist (A Story of the Woods)
Lunar Insight Moon Musings: Hunting, Fires and Parting Shots
December 8th. 2013 ...
Help and Thoughts for Pagans New to the Journey
Using Your Wand in Reverse
Leaving a Group - Part 2: Leaving, Healing and Moving Forward
The Cry of the Soul
December 1st. 2013 ...
The Tarot as a Tool for Raising Consciousness
A Pragmatic Look at Neo Paganism
Leaving a Pagan Group – Part 1: To Leave or to Stay?
November 24th. 2013 ...
The Pagan and the Papacy
The Groovy Aquarian Christ: Jesus From a Pagan Perspective
November 17th. 2013 ...
For Love of the God
Which Witch? Philosophical and Psychological Roots of Wicca
A Threat to Religious Liberties?
November 10th. 2013 ...
Where did Aleister Crowley’s Influence on Wicca Go?
Thoughts on the Threefold Law/Law of Return
The Celtic Tree Calendar
Nine Creeds: A Statement and Explanation of My Beliefs
November 3rd. 2013 ...
The Mundane/Spiritual Mirror: What Does it Say About Your Life?
October 27th. 2013 ...
Thoughts On a Miley-Cyrus/ Robin-Thicke Society
On Being Wiccan: Some Unsolicited Advice
Pagan Religious Communities in your Area: Connecting With and Creating Them
Banishing, Invocation and the Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram
October 20th. 2013 ...
Bottle Spells and Magick in Hoodoo Tradition
Weather Magick: Who is Responsible for the Weather?
Broom Closet: In or Out?
On Coven and Claws
October 13th. 2013 ...
Destroying to Create: A Lesson from the Dead
Consume the Scorpion- Scorpion Energy Revisited
October 6th. 2013 ...
UPG and U: A Breakdown and Building Up of Unverified and Unsubstantiated Personal Gnosis
Answering The Call from Spirit
Coping with the Loss of a Familiar
The Five-way Road: A Pagan Pilgrimage, Part 2 (The South)
September 29th. 2013 ...
Six Reasons Why Covens are Here to Stay
Priestessing and Titles: What's the Point?
Truth or Convenience? Questioning Motives for Spiritual Advancement
Speaking Up: The Conflict Between the Spiritualist and Our Human Experience
September 22nd. 2013 ...
Death of a Friendship within the Craft
NOTE: For a complete list of articles related to this chapter... Visit the Main Index FOR this section.
I Am A Witch! Hear Me Roar!
Article ID: 14282
Age Group: Adult
Days Up: 1,141
Times Read: 3,696
RSS Views: 58,061
Author: Moonlight Feline
Posted: January 23rd. 2011
Times Viewed: 3,696
I remember when I was a little girl; I used to ask my mother why we never went to church like other families. My mother used to come up with various excuse, and I kept asking anyway.
Later in life I became friends with the little Christian girl down the street. If I wanted to spend the night on Saturdays they told me I had to go to church with them the next day. I didn't mind, it was a new experience in my life, and I had always wanted to go. Since we were younger kids, we got to go to youth group. They talked about god and did booklets; by the end of the class they did trivia.
Being stuck watching OPB all my life, I learned a lot about all religions and they had lots of stories from the Bible. Anyway, while my friend goofed off I listened to the teacher. For some reason things didn't feel right. It felt wrong as soon as I stepped inside the building, I couldn't breathe and I felt judged. Despite my discomfort, I was respectful and used my manners. I helped my friend answer all the questions, even though she should of known the answers herself. At the end of class, before we were allowed to leave, the teacher asked us a very personal question. "Have you excepted Jesus Christ into you heart?".
It was said to the whole class, but seeing as I was the new kid, I knew it was directed at me. She told us that if anyone hadn't that we should all close our eyes and raise our hand. I slowly raised my hand. I knew that for me that this was a brave move. I was the only one. She told us to put down our hands and open our eyes. Our eyes met and she told the class (Well, just me really.) that if we wanted to accept Jesus into our heart we could stay after class and talk to her.
When my friend and I were at the door she looked at me and gave me the meanest most judgmental look I had ever seen. I was glad to get out of there; I knew that I could never be a Christian. After that experience, I was ashamed to claim any religion as my own. I felt that they were all to judgmental and that I'd rather spend my time out in nature.
I've always loved nature. Night or day, sunny or cloudy, wet or dry...It's all so beautiful, so MAGICAL. I could sit in one spot for hours, just laying in the grass and listening to the animals or playing in the water and making images in the sand. In a way, I was always a Pagan, a Witch. But I never put a label on my love for nature, for the Earth.
Watching the moon and stars was just a hobby: hikes and walk in the park just something I did for fun. Gardening. That was what first got my interested in Wicca and Paganism. I could make anything grow, and the results were amazing. I wanted to learn more. I started reading books on herbs and natural medicine. I went online a lot, because I often kept library books too long and my late fees were amazing (and not in a good way.) . I often stumbled onto a few Wiccan websites talking about using herbs for magick as well as medicine. I was...intrigued. I just couldn't help myself.
Herb lore was an important thing in natural medicine. We wouldn't have figured out more then half of the things in modern medicine if it weren't for fork lore. Well, after a while I started to read about the other parts of Wicca. I read everything I could find or put my hands on. The library was limited for Wicca. Judaism and Christianity books filled the shelves, and I found only three books. Sad, I know.
The web was my only unlimited source. But before you get the good you must first sift through the bad. Which is a lot of work, and takes hours upon hours to work through. If I saw sites that spelled magick as "magic", I ignored them. I ignored websites with free love spells and that told you if you buy their services you could get back your ex or become rich. I focused on the spiritual part of the religion, and that cut out all the weirdoes and creeps. I studied and studied, never stopping, always reading and learning.
Finally, after much study, I decided to call myself a Pagan. It felt as if a great weight was lifted from my shoulders, and as if my spirit was lighter. It felt RIGHT. It was if I was always meant to be Pagan. I was 13 years old by then. 2 years had passed before I was brave enough and sure enough of myself to claim such a strong connection to the Earth and others. I kept telling myself, you’re a WITCH! My passion for my religion made my heart sing, it was the deep bass of thunder, a lions roar. It could never be contained!
Of course I had to tell my family, I was so proud of myself. My father took it well; he wasn't surprised at all. My mother...well, she was raised Catholic. I don't think she even took me seriously, or if she did she thought I was crazy. My little brother was (and still is) rude and told his friends that I only thought I was a Pagan and didn't even celebrate the holidays. Little did he know, I had been celebrating them for years. As for my big brother, he thought I was an idiot. I knew he wanted me to be a Christian, and like my childhood friend, probably thought (and still thinks) I'm going to Hell.
Personally, I not worried. I'm not sure if my big brother ever found out, but his wife (now his ex) after finding out, gave me a small spell book. "The little book of spells" was cute but very cliché. I loved it, it had novelty and it showed that not all Christians thought the same about Wiccans/Pagans. It showed that I had the love and respect of my sister in law.
I've been a Pagan for 6 years now, and I will be forever more. I am proud of myself and what I'm apart of. I shall never be ashamed to be me. We are all Earth's children, and all of us have a need for faith. Even if we hear our wisdom from different voices. That little Christian girl and me are still best friends, despite religious differences. She listens instead of tuning out when I mention something involving my religion. I do the same for her, and I believe no matter what we need to listen to others even if we don't want to hear it.
I've been working on a Book of Shadows for a few months now. My love of poetry has really helped with that, and with all I know about herbs my book is filling fast. I'm hoping that one day I can share the Earth's wisdom with my children and grandchildren, and hopefully they do the same.
May the Goddess bless you and light your path in your times of darkness.
Blessed Be! XOXO
Location: Veneta, Oregon
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