Which Witch of a Witch Am I?
Article ID: 11006
Age Group: Adult
Days Up: 3,463
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Author: Isis Rose
Posted: November 6th. 2006
Times Viewed: 5,547
The title of this essay has been the very question that has been running through my head since the day I became interested in the craft.
When I was young, my mother and grandmother secretly taught me the ways of our gypsy heritage. And if I wasn't practicing gypsy magick, I was practicing the secrets and magickal legends of our Egyptian heritage. But there was a flaw to practicing all of these things. My father.
In other words, Christianity.
My father always found it necessary to bring up God and the Bible with my mother, brother, and I. And I accepted the faith as easily as I did my other practices. I was young though, and fully unaware that the gypsy practices, Egyptian practices, and Wicca were types of religions themselves.
My father said that he didn't want my brother and I to get hurt. And he didn't want my mother to get punished for what she was teaching us. He was even angry with my grandmother, and still is a little sour about it today. So my mother stopped practicing, and my grandmother discontinued my lessons.
Nonetheless, I continued to practice on my own. But secretly. Therefore proving myself to be very well trained in the gypsy path. But my Egyptian skills slipped once my grandmother and mother had stopped teaching me. They're the only ones who are knowledgeable in that field.
But I had barely known about Wicca, until I met my (now very) best friend, who grew up around the religion all her life. I told her that I had heard of Wicca, but knew nothing of it. Turned out, as long as she'd been exposed to the teachings, she didn't know that much about it either.
So I decided to buy some books on Wicca to find out the background information on it. You know those 'How to become a solitary witch' or ' Wicca the life and history' and cast a few spells here and there. Now you would've thought by at least practicing gypsy magick all of my life that I would have had enough sense to know that I can't just cast a spell all willy-nilly. Good thing for me though, was that I was too young and too afraid to try any of them.
So after that, I decided to turn away from Wicca. I told myself, it really holds nothing for me. I can get through life without Wicca. Then it occurred to me, that I was wrong. Why you ask? Well, because I'm curious. I really didn't know much about Wicca to come to the conclusion that Wicca was wrong for me. So after some time and thought, I decided to give it another go.
Through this little soul search of mine, I came across my other Bff, who like my other one had grown up around Wicca. But she, on the other hand, is more experienced once living in area associated with Shamanism in Russia. All three of us began training ourselves with the Wiccan basics. You know, calling the spirits, meditation, casting circles, calling the quarters, etc.
It wasn't until she told me about the importance of the pentagram that I got freaked out. I was always taught that that symbol was used for the devil. But she kept trying to convince me otherwise. It's when I realized that I could be wrong, that I had needed to be open minded to get through this, and that... well...I needed a tutor, someone who's years defined them as being a true Wiccan. One, so I wouldn't get myself into any trouble, and Two, so I wouldn't embarrass myself in the future.
So while I continued to fill myself with enough knowledge and information on Wicca, I came across this site. In my opinion, it was an answer to my solutions. I continue to come here to train myself with the useful information provided by Wren herself, the staff members of this site, and some other sites that link to these pages.
I still however am involved in Christianity. And everyday I find myself wondering, "Am I going to hell for this?" "Does God hate me now?" "I can't let my parents know.
Especially my father."
I just couldn't stand to have my parents think of me as some evil wannabe. Never.
I knew this was a harsh risk I was taking, and I knew if I made it this far in this search then I won't be giving up on Wicca anytime soon. My friend told me, 'If your parents love you as much as they say they do (and I'm sure they do) then you should tell them your decision in the end when you've fully decided.'
And you know what? I can't say I disagree. As for now though, I've still been wandering around with that same question. Which Witch of a Witch am I? Simply meaning, what kind of witch am I? Which path of the Wiccan way do I pick?
Wicca has been apart of my life from day one. But just not as strong as my gypsy or Egyptian paths. I will continue to study Egyptian as well to see where I lie in this. And through this I've learned to accept who I am (I'm not saying I have trouble with self-confidence) and what I probably will become.
And I won't let anyone hold me back from it. I'll just need to decide. But for now, I'm pretty sure I'm keeping my Gypsy part.
Just this time, I'll bring my newfound knowledge of Wicca along with me.
My real name is Avery, but I go by Isis Rose, Isis for the Egyptian Goddess, and Rose because it's my favorite flower. But don't get me wrong; I love my given name. So I really don't mind if you call me Avery or Isis or Isis Rose.
I decided to write this article so that others will know a little more about me than I had recently posted. I hope others respect for me after reading this.
I’m willing to discuss this topic with others. It’s always nice to talk to someone else about this stuff a little bit more.
Especially someone who's been in the same situation as I've been in.
Location: Columbia, South Carolina
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