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 Page: Profile: Poetry   Total Views: 10,228,762  



Poem Specs

VxPoem ID: 4291

Category:
humor

Posted: May 25th. 2004 7:39:16 PM

Views: 1925

Sorry or how to upset everybody

by Bran

Age Group: Adult



Earth Mysteries Group………….Equinox 1997
It seems that these days everyone I meet is getting more and more polarised towards their own lifestyle agendas and more and more politically correct and unless we are totally insensitive we often end up thinking….Better not say / do that , don’t want to upset anyone ----- Hence the title of this little piece .

SORRY OR HOW TO UPSET EVERYBODY.

At this extreme end of England - Sorry Cornwall - Call it our country - Dont want to upset anyone

Some thoughts at the Solstice – the turn of the year – Yule– Call it the season –Dont want to upset anyone.

Some people coming to dinner – Better prepare Vegetarian.—Sorry Vegan -- Dont want to upset anyone.

Serving drinks – Better stay Teetotal – Sorry no Alcohol -- Dont want to upset anyone.

Quickly explain greenery decorating the house for Yule – Sorry the season – came from trees already down.—Dont want to upset anyone.

Remember after dinner dont genderise anything in conversation with some of the ladies – Sorry, Wimmin –Dont want to upset anyone.

Dying for a f*g – Sorry cigarette, Non-smokers present – Go outside—Dont want to upset anyone.

Oh dear conversation turning to religion – Dont say I am a Pagan and I think Christianity is a cult – Dont want to upset anybody.

The evenings over ---- Thank my Gods – Pour a drink – Light a f*g – and think Bugger it, why cant I just admit that- sorry I am a beer drinking – f*g smoking – Meat eating –Woman loving , Old Pagan and variety really is the spice of life and enjoy upsetting everyone!

Bran Cornwall copyright Author 2002




Author's Notes: Written after realising that so many people that I had dealings with had life style adjenda`s that they tried to inpose on other people. There was a really good performance oppertunity to try and make them realise not every one WANTs to be the same as them and I could not resist it. The most laughs came strangly from a woman who can only be described as a extreme vegan, femanist, lesbian anti smoking, tetotal , treehugger (her description not mine)

Ps F*g is English slang for cigarette, but this machine thinks it is another word for gay and keeps cencering it!!!!!!

Bran Cornwall


Author's Location: Penzance, Cornwall, England
More Poems: Bran has posted 2 additional poems- View them?
Author's Profile: To learn more about Bran - Click HERE
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