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 Page: Profile: Poetry   Total Views: 10,961,167  



Poem Specs

VxPoem ID: 7888

Category:
personal_life

Posted: December 6th. 2004 2:04:51 PM

Views: 1480

Balance

by darkling

Age Group: Adult



I have lived the life
Of the shallow breath
Afraid to draw living,
Deeply
Sure such inhalation
Would unmask
My great vacancy
Reveal my heart
As Singularity
My Collapsar Dreams
The truth
That swells my Gravity
My Emptiness
Has swallowed me
And so has swallowed itself

I see myself as I see myself
One outside the Event
The other inside the Horizon
This is how I have lived
Standing on the edge of forever
Falling over the edge of forever
Forever

I have called this Balance
The Golden Machine of my Child-Self
This flimsy teeter-totter of my Now-Self
Single centerpoint
The Fulcrum Everlasting
My Fear (my heart, my pain, my everything)

I sat Midnight on Midnight
Waiting at Crossroads in the Desert
In the Mountains
In city after city
Only to return the way I came
Sure what I was selling
Even Satan would reject

I saw myself abandoned
So I abandoned
Until finally
The only thing left
The Last Abandonment
Was that of myself
So opened the third set of eyes
On my Edge-of-Forever
My Could Be-Self
The Might-Happen-Tomorrow
That Could-Happen-Never

I can feel the next walk
It builds in me
What was Emptiness
I am learning is Hunger
Clinging to The Past
While flailing about wildly in the Abyss
Isn't Balance, it's Paralysis
And when next I camp at the Crossroads
All I'll have for sale is my Truth
And the faith that the only way
I'll ever return to where I came
Is by walking straight ahead
Until I reach it Somewhere Forward
Somewhere Forward at the other side

chas altvater
perris
12/17/2001




Author's Location: Moreno Valley, California
More Poems: darkling has posted 34 additional poems- View them?
Author's Profile: To learn more about darkling - Click HERE
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