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 Page: Profile: Poetry   Total Views: 10,218,957  



Poem Specs

VxPoem ID: 5431

Category:
humor

Posted: August 4th. 2004 7:08:58 PM

Views: 2087

I Love My Butt

by Phronesus Disegno

Age Group: Adult



Oh yes it's true, I love my Butt!
There are many reasons why.
And if a moment you can spare,
We'll soon see eye-to-eye.

First of all it's a faithful friend
As it swishes to and fro;
More loyal than a puppy dog,
It follows me wherever I go.

And when I'm tired and want to rest,
So notably, I have found,
With nary a complaint it cushions me
When I just want to sit around.

It helps me choose my pants, you see,
By letting me know when they're right:
"I'm lost, these pants are way too loose!"
"Can't breeeaathe! These pants, too tight!"

If I'm dancin' and jammin' here and there
And a wedgie suddenly demands,
A hip grind adjusts my underwear
Without even using my hands.

It's given me courage and so much elation,
No matter how bad it has been.
I know if I can't "face" a situation,
I need only turn around and back in.

And did I mention its musical range?
Such orchestration from within!
A fog horn, a tenor saxaphone,
Or a Stradivarius violin!
(but not a piano.)

Believe your eyes looking up to the skies,
Two spots flying across the Moon:
Propulsion so fast, just WATCH me bypass
Any Witch flying out on a broom.
(to knock the cell phone out of her hand.)

By writing this poem I'm sure you think
That I really must be on crack...
For THAT you can kiss my "you know what" ;-)
And expect it to blow you one back!




Author's Notes: I hope you love your butt, too! ;-)

This poem is dedicated to the "Irish Hedge Witch" (WitchVox profile name, "Emerald Isle") who recently wrote me an e-mail and called me a fartface (well I never!) , and who decided from the beginning that he was going to call me Boobie instead of Boo Boo. And to this day I can't figure out why I like him so much, unless it would be because he makes me laugh too. ;-) Hedgie's got a Wedgie... Gotcha! Hugs to you, my friend!


Author's Location: Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
More Poems: Phronesus Disegno has posted 627 additional poems- View them?
Author's Profile: To learn more about Phronesus Disegno - Click HERE
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