Page: Profile: Poetry
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VxPoem ID: 205
Posted: December 25th. 2003 10:50:43 AM
Joy of My Heart
Age Group: Adult
Who art thou joy of my heart,
and from whenst hast thou come?
Have I in a fit of desire,
recklessly called thee fourth from the ethers,
not knowing the strength of my own hearts song;
a wanton melody that constrains natures love and fury
to manifest my yearning?
What are the mysteries set upon thy face behind Iris windows
of raging blue Seas that secretly envelope any hope of escaping them?
Of the mane of silken earth that dresses thy shoulders
with natures flow of season and time;
of your glory in the power of ancient words spoken long ago
to give hope to a world gone astray as it awaits thy truth.
It is the venom from the merciless arrows of loves bow that hath brought me before thee accused of wishing to constrain thy affections, rendering me as one drunk and silly on fine mead so irresistible and sweet.
Who art thou joy of my heart, but the mirror of my own soul
now deepened beyond the touch of human hands as one ruined to the average.
Who art thou joy of my heart, and from whenst hast thou come.
Author's Notes: One day, many moons ago when I was actively involved in the practice of ceremonial magick, carrying a supply of that energy from practice, there was one event that would change my life forever.
I was rummaging through my things one day doing some spring cleaning when I happened upon a poster size pencil sketch of this women, drawn by a street artist in Mazatlan Mexico. I met the artist in a bar while there in Mazatlan when I was in the Navy; we had pulled in for some R&R. He showed me the picture and I fell in Love with the image he had created, of this beautiful woman with no name…just a face. I purchased it from him for a mere $20.00 which was a steal for such a work.
And here I am years later (and years ago) having happened upon this picture once again.
I unfurled it and gazed at her face once more, still memorized by her beauty.
Looking at her I said ” Where are you….you should have been here by now…out from my dreams to become real.”
I hung her up on the wall of my living room and knelt down as I began to incant with everything in me; emotion from deep down in the bottom of my guts .
“If you will not come…than I do form thee Now!! Now…from the dust of the earth (shouting-pointing) and from every sweet thing that grows thereon, etc.etc..”
A week later, I discovered we had new managers at my apartment complex. Wanting to meet and start a good rapport with them, I went to the office and sat down. In the office was our new property manager, a rather striking woman that I just hit it off with right away. After talking with her I left back for my home with a big smile on my face.
After getting back to my apartment and thinking “I know her…where have I seen her before?” It was then that I looked up and to my shock, she seemed familiar to me because she in fact was identical in appearance to the woman in the picture I had hung there on my livingroom wall.
We really became quite fond of each other and even grew to have a great love for one another, but for this one difference; she was living with and engaged to a man that had no interest in the treasures she harbored within her soul.
It was a little over a year after this that they moved away so that they could both pursue his dreams together back East. It ripped my guts out when she left.
Toward the end, I gave her the picture and begged her to take it with her for they were one in the same, telling her all that had transpired.
One day, she having left the picture out on her kitchen table after I gave it to her, her daughter came home and said, “Mom where did you get this picture of you?” Thats when I knew there was no question whatsoever as to who she was.
Looking back, my lesson in this was I had sealed that magickal operation with the impress of my own weakness, bringing love which is eternal, down to a terrestrial love which is finite and limited and it of course recoiled back upon me most egregiously for this reason.
As my Guide has recently shown me, "finding a partner, is not about finding the right person, but about being the right person." If you force it, there will be woven into the relationship the disharmony that comes from having forced it into existence when not ready for such a one to be there. Or, as in his words, "if you force it, you'll have to deal with stuff that is not in harmony with who you are becoming. Be patient, but open."
In all my burning I now cherish my solitude and the love, harmony and beauty within my own being.
Author's Location: Northgate, Washington
More Poems: Taliesin has posted 46 additional poems- View them?
Author's Profile: To learn more about Taliesin - Click HERE
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